Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Dog days of summer?

Mowed the grass yesterday, then went to finish up with the weed eater. Got the back yard done and proceeded to the front.

I have a neighbor across the street who is in a wheelchair and has 3 pitbulls.

She's very dedicated to these 3 dogs and walks them with her wheelchair religiously. She even brings her poop scooping contraption and cleans up behind them. Problem is she dumps their poop on the deep end of a drainage ditch in front of my place.

I'm aware of this and SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER and just waited and sprayed it with "Roundup", but NOOOOOO......I got carried away and got a little to far into the ditch with the weedeater.

Next thing I know........that unforgettable smell of freshly laid dog squeeze permeates the air and it's following me everywhere I go. I just figured it was comming from the weedeater, but I kept smelling it after I put the weedeater up?

So I checked my shoes. Nope.....no poop there? Then I checked my pants and shirt....nope....no poop there either? I even left my shoes and clothes on the back porch just in case I missed something?

I walked into the kitchen and the smell was even stonger? WTF?????I was at a complete loss as to where that darn smell could be coming from?????

That's when I looked in the mirror.......yep.......you guessed it.....had two globs of fresh dog squeeze right on the end of my frikkin' nose???????

At that point all I could think about was the old skit from Cheek and Chong; "Looks like dog shit, smells like dog shit, feels like dog shit, tastes like dog shit. Must be dog shit. Good thing we didn't step in it!".


Mrsupole said...

LOL, snort, snort, tears rollling down my face from laughing so hard at this one. I was not expecting the nose thing, I thought it had somehow gotten on top of your head, no wonder you kept smelling it everywhere you went. But you must of had a good looking yard.

And I am thinking that maybe you should put a trash can out there for that lady so that way she can put the crap in there. Or at least mail her a copy of this post so she can have a good laugh.

Still laughing, my chest hurts.

God bless.

Uncivil said...

Talk about the shit hitting the fan? I swear......as bad as it smelled.....I believe I had some in my nose?

Mrsupole said...

OMG, you are just too funny and I seriously need some laughs right now. I need to email this to some friends and family.

Still LOL!!!!

God bless.

J at www.jellyjules.com said...

Oh crap! Far too funny. Yeah, offer to get her a garbage, and to empty it for her. Maybe even without a lid, so she doesn't have to maneuver that. Sorry about your face. That's frikkin' hilarious.

Gen says hi, and wishes she could lick your toes. That's not sexual. It's just her way.

Uncivil said...

Hey Julie, give Gen a hug!
I might be selling this place and moving up the road, out in the country and closer to work.
Did the handshake on a place today.
Hope it comes through. An acre of land with an older mobile home on it for $35,000.
Now if I can just get $60,000 for my place, I'll have $25,000 to spruce the new place up with!!!!!
Ha......the best part is I'll have a cemetery on one side of the property, which means it will be nice and quiet!!!!!!!!
No more trunk thumpers from Go-Gas keeping me awake!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

You do do take brown nosing to a whole new level!!!!!!!!!!!

Doggy Dish said...

What a hilarious picture! Thank you for sharing these wonderful posts! I believe that a dog's behavior is reflective of it's owner & your CANINES are as happy as can be! Reading this blog can brighten up anyones day!

randy said...

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